DAY 145: 19 JUN 08

OK where do I begin? Well for starters I am in a much better mood, mindset, and manner. I will back track to Saturday and then hop my way back to today.

Saturday night I went out to a remote part of base that is only allowed to those who work there. Since I was ‘working’ there that night I was allowed. Some could debate that its kind of off base but its still inside the fence so... None the less I went out late to shoot a bomb building piece. A night turn crew builds the bombs that they load on planes. So I go out there and have a ball doing this story as some of the crew were reservists on a 40 day stint so they were elated to have me there. In the mean time I am shooting the story and the one older reservist master sergeant walks over to me and says hey we got some stuff in the area so be aware. I cannot go into full detail as to what he said or what he told me to watch out for but lets just say war stuff. So as I continue to shoot video I have in the back of my mind that I may actually see some crap while ON BASE. Anyway so as I am talking to the one Staff Sergeant he tells me that they are scared out there building at night as there is a real live threat. I on the other hand live and work exactly caddy corner as far away on base as possible. I then proceed to tell him about my trips off base and all of a sudden he is amazed.

At that point it hit me. How much we as service members go off base and risk our asses is all relative. You could do it once or 200 times and you just never know. Each branch of the service and each job within those branches are different so it just all depends. So looking back on the news room discussions about who goes off, and who doesn’t, and who is scared and who isn’t: just rolled right off of my back. I came here, having been doing my job both on base and off when needed and pray that I return safe next month. I may have only been off about 12 times or 13 times but to me the number does not matter. 1 to 200 is the same as it only takes 1 time to hit an IED and meet the Big Man. Now on the other hand you will never ever hear me brag about being mister war because that would be an utter exaggeration and BS and an insult to the guys who have been out 200 times. There must be a balance.

Anyway I must be honest about something here. The night I went out there I was hot and sweating all day so I decided to wear my flight suit. It’s the big brown jump suit you have seen me in pictures wearing. My reasons for doing this included the heat, the possibility of getting dirty, being near the fight line where many workers wear it, and just flat out wanting too. Now technically it is only for use when we go off base in convoys since it is fire retardant but I figured its late at night, no big deal. When I was leaving the office I saw our station commander and out of respect and consideration asked him if I could wear it as I told him where I was going and he said no problem. That ended up kind of saving me.

Before I left that night I did a stand up where I talked about the story and then said goodbye. Well today they aired the story, which you can see in the newscast below, and the one staff sergeant who is on me about all the little things comes in and says “And you were wearing your flight suit because?” I replied that I had permission and that I thought I might get dirty. Now technically I was right but he knew I was walking the tight rope on that one. I went and asked my direct supervisor and he said he did not care but the on camera stand up was what brought it up. None the less this tick for tack game is what later gave way in the week.

Sunday I slept in and then went to work. I stayed up all that night doing my laundry and watching Rocco and Tiger battle it out. Of course at about 5:30AM our time Monday morning Tiger hits the putt on 18 to send it to a 18 hole playoff the next day. I came back got like 2 hours of sleep and got to work at about 9:10AM. I was tired as well all day and conked out at 9PM Monday night before waking up and making it to work at about yet again 9:10AM.

Tuesday brought with it some uproar. My routine is to go in at about 9 AM do some stuff and then go live on air at 10:30 to 2:30. Once I come off air it is my job to send the feed up which entails calling Atlanta and make sure they get us locked in on the satellite to receive our feed. That’s how we get it back to the states. After that I usually produce radio news, check my email, work on spots or other news pieces. Well this week they are training the one marine, who I at first had run ins with, on how to produce/ edit the daily newscast so he can show the next crew. Well it is a hard task and takes time but not almost 6 hours like it took his first day. None the less by 2:30 the feed was not ready and I was getting mad because I got dragged into it when my sole responsibility is to take the tape and get it rolling on the machine that sends it via satellite. Here we are all bickering about it, all stressed out, so finally I ask Atlanta what other time they can take our feed and agree to doing it later. 30 minutes later they finally get the feed onto tape good and one of the other guys sent it up at 5 PM. Once that was done everyone left and I kept working as this has been a long ass week for me.

So there I am all pissed off because the one Staff Sergeant who I get along with 90% of the time, but its always ticking and tacking me, leaves once the newscast is done to go to the gym at about 3 PM. As I am writing a script the E 8, our station commander strolls in and asks how I am and all. Now he is a real nice guy and I am always very upbeat in my conversation with him so he immediately notices my demeanor and asks what’s up. BAD TIMING. Unfortunately for me he did not realize that it was Rob blowing off steam to his first name versus SrA to SMSgt. None the less I make a few brief comments and they end up making my supervisor look bad for not handling it between he and I. My bad. Later that night we get an email from my/ our supervisor about having to be at work daily from 8 to 4:30 daily.

Next day I come in and am working on my story and ask the one SSgt who leaves daily at 3 to send the feed up. He says yeah I might as well since I have to be here until 4:30. And then the major uproar ensued! He and the marine (its funny how they work together on me but then knock heads later in the same day) just start going off on me about how I jumped my chain of command, and need to get out of the Air Force, and all of this. I made a few rebuttals but they were pissed because while yes I did not use my chain of command directly, and am wrong, I made them have to hang around longer than they prefer. I will say they do go to the gym and do come back but not much is done on the back side of that coming back.

What really sucked though was my direct supervisor, who I absolutely love working for, felt betrayed and like he made no progress with me about the whole chain of command thing. Then he made the comment that really took me down. He said I have never had such a problem with someone not getting the two simplest things in the military down: being on time and the chain of command. Now I will plead guilty on my allegiance to the latter but being on time when I am AT WORK ALL OF THE TIME really hurt me. We all work a ton of hours and a flexible schedule so this one made me feel like a piece of _____. By the time this barrage was over it was about time for me to head to the studio for my show.

I literally sat in the studio the whole 4 hours and thought about all of the stuff that was said to me and how I felt about myself. I was defeated in so many ways at that point I cannot relate. I finished the show and went into the news room clearly rejected. As I waited for the one marine to get off of the computer that we share the E 6 came in and said hey what the heck is a matter you look like hell. I replied with something very weak and uncharacteristic at which point he said lets go talk in my office.

We talked for probably a good 30 minutes and man was it good. I got it all off of my chest and was able to refocus. He explained so much to me, gave me so much advice, and really set me straight. Whether I like it or not I must yield to the chain of command and will. I commend him for being a good NCO but more intuitively, being able to understand ROB.

I got a great night’s sleep last night, got up got a shower, shaved, checked my personal email, and then went to work and had a killer day. I am refocused and ready to knock out these last 35 days or so. I cannot predict the future but if I had to say there was a turning point in my AF career that conversation yesterday very well may have been it.

Everyone was in a good mood today and things went real smooth. 3 of us agreed to see how much we could bench press and today was the day. I promised 175 and delivered while the one big SSgt, who can get at least 205 up, was not feeling well so had some troubles today. Finally the guy that gave me the great talk put up about 210. He got 205 with no issues so I will give him 210. The amazing part is that he only weighs about 150 or so. I am about 162 so 175 is good for me but 150ish putting up 205 is impressive.

On a future note I am doing a story at the hospital on base tomorrow along with a profile of a Oakland Raiders Cheerleader who is deployed here as a service member. Don’t worry Michelle I find you more attractive and hers are fake anyway. I should not type that because I have only seen a picture of her and the fake part is news room conjecture which we all know is just a bunch of deployed males shooting their mouths off.

I am not sure if anyone saw it but it looks like that new GI Bill is going to be passed. I have yet to get the final details but depending upon the incentives, the odds of me reenlisting may have just gone up. If I do another enlistment I get the GI Bill and that would allow me enough time to finish my masters on the AF’s dime. Then I am set to get a PhD or God forbid a law degree! WORLD LOOK OUT!

Anyway enjoy the newscast with my bomb building story. Everyone have a great night and thanks for reading.